Can’t seem to finish anything. Couldn’t face church today. Feel very guilty but also justified as first service would have been to intense and second service too many people. Started watching things can’t finish them, started listening to a lecture, can’t finish it, started colouring in a picture can’t finish it. Ended up going out for a walk, thinking maybe if I clear my head I might feel better but after about 40 mins realised it was doing no good and I was just aimlessly wandering to no where. Cried so hard last night I made myself sweat. Cried so much today not sure I can cry many more tears. Nearly all dried up. So fed up.